Sorry, sorry, sorry. . .
I know it's been a while.
Life is happening. And lots of it is happening a lot faster than I had anticipated. It's also happening, in a lot of ways, that I don't like or want. But what am I to do about that?
My mom is hanging in there. But it's hard to watch her be sick and not feel like doing anything. That's not who she really is.
Anyway, I digress away from my point, but not totally. So here we go:
I was upstairs in my son's room putting him to bed the other night. Somehow or another, I asked him if he remembered his crib being in his room when we first moved in. And he couldn't remember it.
I, of course, remembered it like it was yesterday. It was on the opposite wall from where his bed is. We moved his bed in his room immediately even though he was still sleeping in his crib, because we knew it probably wouldn't be that much longer until he moved out of it. And I'm sad to say, I don't remember exactly how old he was when he moved to the bed. I do remember it was, of course, really fast. One day he wanted to nap in the big boy bed, and I believe I remember that he was sleeping in the big boy bed for everything by the very next day. One day, my baby was a baby, and the next thing I knew, we were disassembling the crib.
Same with his clothes. I bought him some new underpants the other day. And they look so BIG. And then I remembered some of his first pairs of underpants. I even went upstairs and pulled a pair out. And they were sooooooo tiny! Part of me couldn't believe that my baby was ever that small, and another part of me couldn't believe he was so big now!
Life is like that. It comes at you fast, and if you aren't looking, it just keeps right on going. And that's sad when we are in "that" place, because then we miss stuff.
With my mom being ill, it has made me wonder what I missed about her. What questions will I not get to ask her? What will I never know about? That is sad.
Her illness seems to be progressing quickly. At least I think so. I could be wrong, and I hope I am. We moved into this house just four short years ago. When we moved in, I never EVER would have thought my mom's health would be where it is today. I wished I would have known. I'd have paid more attention.
Sorry - I know this seems like a downer kind of a post. But it is just a little of where I am today. So do me a favor. Slow down. Pay attention. Look around. Ask questions about your loved ones. Stare at your kids and see if you can actually see them growing. I know we can't see everything, but we can at least pay more attention while we are here.
Oh and one more thing: Hug and kiss all your peeps today. The ones that matter. I'm going to do that every chance I get.
Happy Day, folks.