I am mired down in so much junk this week. I have a lot to do. I have bills to pay, a budget to prepare, clothes to wash, dishes to unload/load in the dishwasher, appointments to make, groceries to buy, blog posts to write, a book to write on, and about a zillion other things to do that I am not listing here because I've already depressed myself with what I just typed.
So why am I not getting it done?
Well two reasons. (And at least this one thing on my list is being done. This morning. In secret.)
Reason number one.
My little guy is sick. He's been sick since Monday afternoon. He is running a temperature. I took him to the doctor yesterday, but his strep test came back negative. So that's good. But he's missing school. And I feel really bad for him because they are doing "Countries Around the World" this week. He went to France on Monday and had his "passport" stamped. And this morning he woke up and asked if he could go to school.(I know all you experienced moms out there. I need to write this down and enjoy it because that will go away the second he steps foot into Kindergarten.) I had to tell him no. We were laying in his bed together when I told him. And it broke my heart, because he cried. Hard. He wants to go to all the other countries too, and get his passport stamped. I wanted to cry too.
So I did what any other mom would do. I called the school this morning and asked if they could send home some of the activities they've been doing. And I'm going to find out some of the other things they did in class. And by gosh, Jman will "visit" all these other countries. I'll make some kind of treat for him to have from each country, and figure out a few phrases to go over, and find some kind of stamps for in his "passport". I just wish he could be doing it with his friends. But it will be better than nothing, right?
But having him home with me sort of puts a damper on doing some of the stuff I need to get done. Because of course, he's not feeling so very bad that he's just sleeping. And don't get me wrong, I don't want him to feel that way, really. He still wants to play. So it's rounds and rounds of playing little figures, coloring, games, etc etc. And from time to time, I sneak in to get something done. Who knew playing little figures would be tiring to a grownup? But it can be.
And so then that leads me to:
Reason number two.
And reason number two is that I'm feeling a little "off". I assume some of that is because I'm out of the ordinary routine of things. So I get that. I am stressed too. Joshua is supposed to have a small surgical procedure tomorrow that will remove the remaining tube from one of his ears. He got tubes in when he was about 18 months, and one of them just is not going to come out on its own. So if he is healthy enough he'll go. If he's not, he won't, but then he'll still stay home from school for being sick.
And we may even think he's fine and go to the hospital only to have to come home because of something they find. Who knows? But that is stressful to me. Once I have it in my mind that something is going to happen at a certain time, it needs to happen then. Or else.
Or else it doesn't, but it makes me very grumpy. And anxious. And stressed. Am I the only one who feels that way? (If I am, someone please lie to me and tell me it's totally normal. And even if I ask you if you are lying, don't tell me. Unless I threaten you with bodily harm. Then you might want to tell me the truth. And then run.)
So I know I've got a big mountain of "Oh My God, I'm Never Gonna Catch Up On All This Crap" to do. And what did I tackle first? The blog post. Because frankly, if I don't write about this, I'll explode. Or just sink further down in the pit of "I'll never get to all this". And that's not a fun place to be.
I know most of my posts recently have been more on the funny side. I just ain't feeling all that funny today. But don't despair. I'll get out of this. It helps to write it down. You know. And share it with the entire world. So now you all know I'm depressed. Isn't that fun?
I'm staring at this pile of bills. I guess I'll go there next. After another round of little figures. I think that's another reason I get depressed. Joshua never lets me drive the firetruck or the ambulance. Maybe if he naps today, I'll take them in the other room and play with them by myself. And make all the sirens go. And use the little stretcher the right way instead of pretending it's another car. Because that's how you're supposed to use it. IT'S NOT A CAR. IT'S A STRETCHER.
The sun'll come out. . .
PS - I know the other day I asked for ADD meds. But today, if you feel like mailing me something, can you send me some anti-depressants? Just label it so I don't get them mixed up with the ADD meds. Or maybe not. It could be interesting. . .