Thursday, December 16, 2010

Snow - I Wish I Still Had My Rose Colored Glasses On About it.

Do you remember when you were a kid, how you'd hear the mention of the word snow, and you'd be running to the windows waiting to spy the first few flakes falling out of the sky?  And then when it got deep enough, you'd go outside and play in it for hours (at least it seemed that way to me!), and you'd come in and take off your sopping wet clothes, and you'd feel your bright red skin, and it was freezing cold to the touch.  And your mom would fix you hot cocoa and some yummy treat, and you'd be all excited about that and then before you knew it, you'd be searching out dry clothes again to repeat the playing you'd done earlier?

You'd also do snow dances in the hopes your school would close?  Do you remember being out of school for like a week or more at a time?  I remember the schools would be closed, but my mom, after a day or two, would take us over to the local mall, and we'd shop and eat lunch (at Cloverleaf Mall, and I think there was a Burger Chef there we'd eat at.), and then we'd go home and we thought it was so fun to be out of school and get to go do fun stuff.  It was like being on vacation!  Bliss.

Yeah.  I remember that. 

Funnily enough, my feelings on the white fluffy stuff has changed quite a bit.  I think it happened when I had to start being a responsible adult with a job.  And that job was in local county government.  And said local county government never closed for snow.  I had to try to drive in it for the first time.  And of course, you guessed it, I wrecked my car.  Good times.  That was the first time I started disliking the snow.

Then there was the time that Jamey was working and we'd already gotten a huge snowfall earlier in the week.  And round two was here.  And Jamey called to ask if he could stay at the apartment I shared with another girlfriend.  And so I said yes, because his apartment was a lot further away.  And I look out, and all the parking spots had been taken by residents.  The remaining spots had snow and ice piled up that had been plowed from the earlier storm.  So I decided to be a good girlfriend and go shovel a spot so Jamey would have a place to park. 

There was just one problem.  I didn't have a snow shovel.  Face it.  Two young college girls, living in an apartment.  We had clothes.  We had jewelery, shoes and handbags (cheap Target handbags).  And we had small kitchen appliances.  We didn't think about tools or shovels or anything else remotely manly.  So I look around for something to help me clear the snow.  The only thing I could find was a broom.  That's it.  But don't forget, I was trying to be a good girlfriend, so I gamely went out with my broom and started to try to clear some snow away.

And I wasn't making any progress.  Shocker, right?  There was so much ice built up on the underlying snow from the earlier storm, that it just wasn't budging.  So I finally figured out that I could unscrew the broom from it's handle.  I started pounding the broom handle into the icy snow and breaking it off.  Kind of chunking away at it, if you will.  And then I started making some headway.  But you can see this is headed for disaster, right?  And so I got some of it broken up, and I moved it with my (ungloved) hands.  Then I went back and started chunking at it again.  And then the broom handle got stuck!  I couldn't move it.  So I put both hands around the handle and got myself over top of it, and pulled.  Really hard.  And it came loose!  And the pole smacked me right in the face.  Right to the outside of my left eye.

Yep.  I'm lucky I didn't poke my eye out.  Cos that would have stung a little bit.  But don't you worry, because where I hit myself still hurt like heck.  So much that I dropped to my knees and picked up a big chunk of snow and immediately put it to my face where the pole had hit.  I sat there for a minute, nursing my wound, when I heard a man's voice call out to me.  He said, "Don't you have a snow shovel?"  I looked over and I said, "No."  And he said, "Well hang on a minute."  And I thought, Oh thank goodness, he's going to help me.  I walked over to his apartment door,  and he came back to the door.  I showed him where the pole had hit, and I said, "Do I have a black eye?"  And he said, "Not yet, but you're gonna."  And then he said, "Here you go. Just leave it on the front porch when you are done."  And he handed me a snow shovel.  Then he smiled and waved and shut the door.  I stood there in shock for a minute, and then I realized he really wasn't coming back to help me and be my hero. 

So I trudged back over and I had just started digging again when a car came up.  And the passenger door opened, and it was Jamey.  Who hitched a ride over with a friend of his so he could drive me the next day to work.  (And so they could do doughnuts in the snow.  I mean, I'm not stupid here.)  All my hard work and a black eye so I could provide an empty parking spot for no one to park in.  Yep.  Good times.

And now I don't work anymore. (At the moment.  And I mean I don't work outside of the home anymore.  Cos I definitely still work.)  And the snow is still a real pain.  It's messy.  It's cold.  It closes school for days on end.  My child gets ants in his pants to do something, but he's not at the age yet where he wants to stay out even though he's turned into a human icicle.  No.  He's at the age where you get him bundled up in the 3 pairs of pants, two shirts, a sweatshirt, a coat, a hat, gloves, mittens, four pairs of socks, taped his snow boots to his pants so they don't get snow in them (and also so they stay on his feet because they are probably a size and a half too big), and then he says he has to go to the bathroom.  Or he's changed his mind and doesn't want to go in the snow because it's too cold.

And now my poor kid isn't going to get to do his school play because they cancelled school last night.  You know.  Because it was supposed to snow today.  And OK, yes, it has just started snowing.  I know that it will stick fast, because it has been very cold the last several days.  But still.  They've closed school before because it was "supposed" to snow and it never did.  I think these guys often jump the gun.  But whatever.

So now he misses his school play, the class Christmas party (because you know they'll be closed tomorrow too), and the worst part?  He has two stuffed sheep babies at his school who were taking part in the Christmas Play.  And because school will be closed today and tomorrow?  Well that means those two stuffed babies will be there all the way through break.  Oh yes.  If he remembers, I'm toast.  I pray he doesn't remember.  All this stress because of snow.

It's different for adults.  It's falling now, and I enjoy watching it come down.  For about five minutes.  But after that, I'd like it to go away.  Seriously.  I'll end my post like this.  So thanks snow.  Thanks for showing up and being pretty and a real pain in the behind.  Now go away.

(Sorry.  What a scrooge!  But still!)  Have fun and be safe out there!

1 comment:

  1. You are too funny!! Now that I'm back to teaching, I'm a huge fan of the snow!! I have some Christmas activities planned for my students- and I plan on still doing when we get back- who cares if it's Jan?!?


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